It’s not like we had a cooked breakfast in England often but our attempts to make bacon and eggs in Denmark have been fruitless so far. The eggs are lovely. But the bacon is streaky and about 99% fat. The sausages aren’t sausages. They’re Frankfurters in disguise. Which is odd when you consider that Denmark is home to more pigs than people. Fact is, it all gets exported to places like the UK.

Last night I stayed at a country pub in a place called Badby in Northamptonshire. So I qualified for this dish, which I really enjoyed. In spite of the fact that I’d rather have stayed in bed.

We (me and my Danish bakery client) set off for Bagshot in Surrey at 8am. Only to be met by continuous traffic from the moment we hit a motorway.

We arrived at our destination at 1030. Which is just plain daft considering it’s a one and a half hour drive, tops.

Not the best journey to set you up for a four hour presentation. But it went superbly well.

Tonight, I sleep at the Royal Berkshire Hotel in Ascot. A rather grand establishment next door to the cottage that once belonged to John and Yoko. And bordering onto the house that used to be owned by that Russian who was murdered by plutonium.

Oh, and opposite a Sheik’s mansion with what’s supposed to be the most expensive wall in the UK to protect it.